my list of 'nevers'

today in church, i was trying my hardest to listen to the sermon, rock sophia in her carseat (praying she would stay asleep or at least not scream in church), and not be distracted by the kids across the aisle

i was slightly successful-sophia didn't scream :) and i heard most of the sermon

but i was very distracted

these kids were sprawled out on the floor (not horrible), each one had a mountain dew or root beer (24 oz mind you), cell phone to play games on (they only had one so mom had to change seats mid-service so the kids could share), and each kid got up at least once during the service

see, when i was a kid (wow, now i sound old), we were not allowed to get up and exit during service

even when i sat with my friends, i KNEW my parents were watching me and ready to spank me as soon as i got home if i got up or goofed off

and i know i shouldn't do this for fear of it all coming true, but i made a few of my own 'my daughter will nevers' right there

1-she will not drink pop (or have her own beverage until she is responsible enough to not spill it everywhere) in church

2-she will not get up during church

3-she will not be on a cell phone during church

this next one is for me...4-i will not tell my child to 'shut up' (in public at least :) ) like this mom did to her loud children

now after i have this whole thing typed up, i decided to read our small group's chapter for the week from the book 'humility-true greatness' by c. j. mahaney...and feel very bad

i shouldn't judge other families/parents because i am learning and KNOW that i will screw up and other parents will look at me and say 'my child will never do that!'

so i apologize if this is a horribly mean blog...i guess it's my true thoughts

garage saling again

even though it is near the end of september, indiana is once again being indiana and has been in the 80s for the past week...then yesterday and today when mom, sophia, and i go garage saling, it gets cold, overcast, and rainy

oh well, didn't stop us though :)

yesterday we went out for a few hours and i found a diaper sprayer...hooks up to your faucet so you can spray of the poop in the toilet

it was on my list of things to get one day but at $50, i decided to wait...thankfully because it was $3 at the garage sale :)

then at the same garage sale the lady found out we are using cloth diapers and says, 'oh man! i just gave away all my cloth diapers!' :( sad but it turns out the lady she gave them too had two kids she was doing cloth diapers with (go her!!!)

then today i got a little music thing that hooks onto her crib that i have been wanting

but again, at $50, i decided to wait...and got it for $5 :)

and on a note about me, i got a little 'bonus' from work (it is a program where you can do some 'extra' stuff, like volunteer work, being charge nurse during your shift, extra education, etc and then get points for the things you do and in turn get a little extra money)

i wasn't expecting much but i picked up the check this week and it was a whole lot more than i expected!!! so john surprised me and got me a pair of brown slouch boots i have been wanting and this ADORABLE white coat!!! gotta love him!!!

so now sophia and i will be both stylish for winter :)

oh and my mom got a changing table at a garage sale today so now she is set to babysit...and cannot wait to do that :)

singing

well i am trying to occupy myself while sophia cries it out in her crib...it is incredibly hard for me and i have to keep myself very occupied in order to not go pick her up and can it all :(

so i decided to blog and add a video...first one :)

this video is john singing...making it look like sophia is

it's a weezer song and yes, this is john's voice :)

guilt

today i felt guilty

well to be honest i've been feeling guilty about today for the last week...

my good friend amelia had her bachelorette party in fort wayne (about 45 minutes away)

i planned on going but kept feeling guiltier and guiltier as the day approached

how could i call myself a good mom if i plan on leaving my baby? and would she take a bottle? would she cry all night long (or all 4 1/2 hours long) and drive john crazy?

it's one thing for her to cry for me because if i can't find any other answer to her crying, i can always offer her the boob...john can't quite do that one

thankfully i have an excellent husband and he encouraged me to go out with my friends for awhile...he knew he could handle it/her

he did well, a little stressed but a good job

she cried for awhile for him, had a tough time with the bottle, then cried herself to sleep, took another bottle, then when i got home she was laying in her crib just talking and happy

it made me feel a little better about returning to work on october 7th

still nervous but it makes me a little more at ease

so thank you to my wonderful husband who did an excellent job with sophia tonight without me

and thank you to God for answering my prayers that she would not be blood-curdling screaming...because if she had been, i may have cried

and now she's asleep and i'm going to bed too...overall a successful day :)

colds are no fun

so sophia has her first cold :( so sad

last night when she woke up (more than normal), she sounded like she had boogers from her nostrils to the back of her head...so when i used the nose bulb syringe to clear them out, she screamed and screamed and screamed

and any amount of 'it's for your own good sophia' did not help her calm down...eating did though :)

then all day today she has had red-rimmed eyes, runny nose, snotty nose, drooling sometimes, and crying more than normal...poor sophia

i feel bad for her and feel worse that i can't communicate that it will go away soon and she'll be back to normal

oh well, just hoping tonight that she doesn't wake up a ton, and she gets some rest

poor little sophia

bottles again...

i am finding that i spoke a little prematurely...i think

earlier i posted that i found the perfect bottle and she liked it

well, i think she thought it was funny to watch her mom buy the most expensive bottle out there, used it for a few tries, and no more

i tried it the other day and she cried so hard i gave up (i know, i shouldn't have :( ) and let her breastfeed

so the next day i was determined to get through this

we tried the adiri bottle again and she cried so hard she was coughing and tears flowed

i called my mom crying, sure that she would never get a bottle down and i would have to do formula or something (yes, i too can be dramatic)

mom got me through it and told me that she has to do it...which i know

anyway, the next feeding i tried the playtex vented advanced bottle (or whatever it is called)

she took it and seemed to do ok

then today i tried the bottle again, she seemed to take it but afterwards was horrible...crying, wouldn't sleep well, farting, and acting hungry again

after an hour of crying and moaning and groaning, she fell asleep

then ate a TON for the next feeding (breastfeeding because bekah was in the middle of taking pictures and we had no time)

so tomorrow is going to be day #3 of down and dirty bottle feeding with sophia

pray for me that i will make it through and that she will get it down...because i am gone at a bachlorette party on saturday for about 5-6 hours

and then in 3 weeks i am back at work...weird how time flies

we can do this sophia!!! we can do it!!!

fellow moms

i LOVE having other girls (or women i guess i should say) around that are fellow moms

it is fun (somedays) to learn together, and SO SO nice to be able to go through trials and struggles and fun times together

i personally love having other moms around to ask questions of...and then laugh about things later

also, i remember having girlfriends my age growing up and can only imagine how much fun it will be for sophia to have girlfriends in church and school that she grows up with

and think of all the cool 'aunts' and 'uncles' around

in short, i am incredibly glad that God has allowed me to have a group of girlfriends around who are having girls (mainly :) )

this will be one fun adventure