funny quotes

so while my little one is cooing in her little chair, i took a little time to read my (free) parenting 

magazine and came across some hilarious quotes by kids...thought i would share

the question: 

'what did mommy do that made you mad?'

the answers: 

'she made me turn off my favorite cartoon and made me go pee'

'she tried to dress me right away on monday. i thought it was still the weekend; she skipped saturday!'

'she made me clean up. i really didn't want to. i like it better when people give me options.'

'she makes me poop in the potty. it's dangerous.' (my absolute favorite)

and then i also came across another list that made me sigh in relief...top ten worries you'll laugh about later

1-that she really will tell her shrink you left her to cry it out in her crib

2-that they don't make pull-ups and sneakers with velcro for grown-ups

3-that not nursing her for the standard year (or ever) means he will wind up obese, stupid, and maladjusted

4-that the fact that she's such a nice, quiet girl means neighbors will one day tell reporters, 'i'm shocked! she was always such a nice, quiet girl.'

5-that a preference for dolls over trucks bodes well for the future of musical theater

6-that she'll be crushed when she discovers that she can't really be a firefighting astronaut veterinarian who treats alien animals in outer space

7-that if you throw out one of the 7,652 pieces of artwork dropping glitter onto the rug he will feel deeply hurt

8-that she's be dependent on you well into her 30s because you didn't read to her in the womb (so glad to hear this one :) )

9-that her sense of humor will never advance beyond fart jokes

10-that she might stop loving you as much as she does now

gotta love the free magazines